The Hooker

I'm always on the lookout for new and different ways to market my freelance writing and copywriting business. I scour the online job boards regularly, and respond to many of the listings.

A couple of weeks ago I responded to a generic advertisement for copywriters who could write short articles for newsletters, which were to be sent to the advertiser's clients.

I responded to this ad and several others with my standard inquiry, included the addresses for my website and blogs and a couple of samples of my work. I expected their response to say they were looking for someone to write articles on a regular basis. These assignments generally don't pay much, but if there isn't a lot of research to be done for the articles, the volume makes up for it. This often turns into a steady income stream and another client to list on my website.

The first response I got was a very long (cut and pasted) email explaining that she was looking for freelance writers who didn't have huge egos and expect to be paid the "ridiculous" fee of $85 an hour, to write short articles to include in her newsletters. As I continued reading the first page, about three-quarters of the way down, she mentioned that she didn't use the term "prostitute" very often, but it was "sometimes necessary". She went on to explain that whoever she hired must be open-minded.

My interest piqued, I read on. She made it clear her business wasn't "prostitution per se" (her words), but to sell books on how to open and operate an escort service. The information she would sell included: how to open a legitimate merchant bank account, how to apply for and be granted the ability to take credit cards, how to legally advertise in phone books and newspapers, and how to avoid arrests.

She must have known what she was talking about because her books were selling for $70 each, or one could purchase the whole "system" for a mere $380. A link directed me to her website where she had no less than a dozen "testimonials" from satisfied customers.

While the possible ramifications of aiding and abetting a crime ran through my head, and without any intention of actually writing for her, I responded.

It seemed very important to her that whoever she hired owned adequate equipment in the way of computer system, phone lines, printers/scanners, and a litany of other demands. I assured her that I owned all the necessary equipment, and to prove I "wasn't afraid to" give her my phone number--as stipulated in her email--I gave her my cell number.

Her response to this email was so defensive, I couldn't help myself. I shot her another email, again stating my qualifications to write for her, even though I "had no interest what-so-ever in opening or operating an escort service". She shot back telling me that she was not only NOT going to hire me, but I had been blocked from ever emailing her again.

You just can't please all the people all the time. I wonder how much she charges per hour for her "work".